Published: 18 July 2022
"Sod this for game of soldiers" said Max.
"Meaning what exactly Max?"
"Meaning dear boy, that we've been sat around all day waiting for a heat wave that will melt the railway track, bring down the power lines and cast us all back in to the dark ages, while outside in the park, its a lovely, pleasantly hot day like the summer's of your youth, topped off with the most delicious breeze."
"And said Max, surely it is time to bogger off to the pub before the dire threats to close them announced on the dear old BBC become the actuality."
"Government warnings must be heeded Max. We must close the schools, the zoos, public building (such as there are left to close these days), the railways and the pubs in order to reinforce the lessons of Covid."
"The lessons of Covid?" said Max, "What are the lessons of Covid?"
"Well I'm not really sure Max but I suppose it's something to do with throwing millions onto the dole queue, then bringing 'em back by printing money to support business profits and share holders dividends."
"You think they should do that again?" said Max, ”Has’t it led to massive inflationary pressures?”
“No Max, that has been caused by the railway workers asking for a pay rise. besides which the government might not well not,have time before it turns cold again, and you have to act swiftly and decisively if you are to keep everyone safe you know."
"Safe from what? said Max.
Safe from being hot and uncomfortable at work Max, it would be callous and irresponsible not so to do."
"Don't people in Egypt, Mexico City and Riyadh work in temperatures like this much of the time." said Max.
"Ah but they have the infrastructure to cope with the heat Max."
"The infrastructure being big hats, long gowns and head scarfs?" said Max.
"I Was thinking more or shady courtyards and air conditioning."
“I didn’t thing air conditioning was much to be approved of these days.” said Max, “but assuming I'm wrong, how, pray tell, is it deployed on building sites in Dubai?”
“In the site managers office.” I ventured.
.... Later in the Stratford Haven.
"Your enjoying this aren't you?” said Max.
"I'm putting up a brave front Max in trying conditions."
"You said it reminded you of a sultry evening in KL or Karachi." said Max.
"I never said that Max."
"But you thought it didn't you? Just missing the sweet aromas, the humidity and the exotic food?"
"Stop doing that Max, my thoughts are my own."
"I don't think they are." said Max. "Not when you share a brain with dog deprived of bar treats, whatever the weather... Bloody hell your now thinking it might be even better tomorrow aren't you?"
"Well the thing is Max, I may never have the opportunity to travel in hot climes again. It's rather wonderful that they are bringing them here for me to enjoy in West Bridgford. I don't even have to get on a bus."
Beer and biscuits
- Loop Daddy
- A day without beer.
- Silver King
- Red Raven
- Manhattan Project
- Netherfield Lagoons.
- Ludlow Blondes
- Ilkley Summer
- Midnight Owl
- Dancing Duck
- Bass in the Chestnut
- Harvest Pale
- Slap in the Face
- Elsie Mo
- Green King IPA
- The Famous Grouse
- Snowhite Pale
- Electric Dreams
- Theakston's Old Peculiar
- Bass - King's Head
- Speculation Ale
- Summer Storm
- Black Sheep
- Citra - The Embankment
- Butcombe Original
- Oakham Citra
- Catch the Rain
- Modern Love
- Postcode Envy
- Shipstones' Goldstar
- American IPA
- Brother Rabbit
- The Outrun - Amy Liptrot.
- The Enemy Within (4th Edition) - Seumas Milne 2014
- Tessa, The Trader's Wife - Louis Becke (1901)
- The End of the Tether - Conrad (1902)
- La Dame Aux Camilias - Alexandre Dumas
- Turn of the Screw - Henry James
- The Beast in the Jungle - Henry James (1903)
- Alice's Adventures in Wonderland - Lewis Caroll 1807
- Man and Maid - Elinor Glyn (1922)
- The Hollow Needle - Maurice Leblanc = 1909
- Montpelier Parade - Karl Geary
- Five Run Away Together. - Enid Blyton
- Dracula - Bram Stoker - 1897
- Days Without End - Sebastion Barry (2016)
- The Witch Finders's Sister
- A Week in December - Sebastian Faulks
- The Devil and Miss Prym - Paul Coelho - 2000
- The Long and Winding Road - A Memoir (Alan Johnson 2016)
- William (Richmal Crompton 1929)